Organizational Cancer


"There's nothing like the sight of an amputated spirit. There is no prosthetic for that."
~ Al Pacino as Lt. Col. Frank Slade in The Scent of a Woman


At some point in my early disciple life, I read or heard Guru say that after his death, the Center as an organization would implode. The implosion began this morning in San Francisco.

In truth, though, it's more like a cancer than an implosion. Like pancreatic or liver cancer -- which exhibit few symptoms until it's too late to do anything about -- the poison of Guru's exploitation of his female disciples metastasized seemingly in secret.

Sure, there were warning signs. Sevika, Rupavati, and Phulela all spoke publicly and courageously. Guru was alive then, however, and they were easily dismissed. Then Guru died. Since then -- with cancerous cells lodged in every vital center of the Center organization -- it's just been a matter of time.

If there was any doubt about the diagnosis, it was confirmed with the coming out of Suchatula. Sevika's, Rupavati's, and Phulela's stories weren't evidence of just some isolated, benign ailment. Instead, their stories were symptomatic of a malignant disease that Guru sowed within his organization, which now reaches all the way into the very leadership circle of the Center.

It will be with little wonder that we look back at this time, years from now, and realize that this was when the patient put the first step in the grave.

Not surprisingly, I guess, it started in San Francisco. That's where Suchatula spent more than 20 years as a disciple working at the disciple-owned vegetarian restaurant Ananda Fuara, alongside some of the very old-guard disciples, like Nirvik, Sundari, Venu, and Dharana, who once watched over me as a youngster in the Center. The San Francisco disciples knew Suchatula.

They couldn't easily dismiss her.

Now, as it turns out, at least two other San Francisco disciples have reported similar stories (one admitting to sex with Guru, the other to being pressured into sex with another female disciple). Their reward for making the ultimate surrender to Guru?

It appears these two women are gone from the Center (one apparently kicked out, the other fleeing the inevitable). The disgraceful treatment meted out to them was also visited on a prominent younger San Francisco male disciple named Viddyut.

"If you're not 100% for Guru," they were told, "then you're out!"

The chutzpah! These women -- and the dozens like them -- were the only disciples "100% for Guru!" They gave body, mind, and soul to him. And Viddyut's crime? He believed his sister-disciple's stories -- because they're true -- and he showed these women support.

This is the beginning of the end for the Center as even an arguably legitimate enterprise. If an organization founded upon the principles of yoga isn't about seeking the truth no matter where it lies, then it might as well be burned to the ground. The sheer incompetence of the Center's board of directors evidenced by this morning's events is nothing short of stunning.

Is there not one fucking person in the whole of this cancer-ridden organization that can make a stand against his or her own goddamned personal interest?

Not one?

As our fictional hero Lt. Col. Frank Slade might say in the video above, the "leaders" of the Center are "killing the very spirit this institution proclaims to instill." Does nobody in the organization care enough to speak out?

It's ironic, I suppose, that the leader of the San Francisco Center -- Garima -- is a doctor and might know a thing or two about the importance of attacking malignancy. I hope she'll set an example for others to follow. I don't remember first meeting Garima, but it must have been during those early heady days when I would sneak out of my dad's house as a 16 year old to go to meditations up at the old San Francisco Center on 16th Avenue and Taraval Street in the Sunset District.

Back then, Sevika was the Center leader there and Garima kept a very low profile. By the time I had ensconced myself as a local disciple in New York, Sevika was on her way out. It was Garima, then, who took over the duties of Center leader. It was sometime later that my only real memory of Garima was established.

Very late one night -- actually, it was probably very early one morning -- after a long drive back from a concert in New Jersey, Vinaya and I arrived at Guru's house to find the place dark. Typically, when concerts were held in Manhattan, for example, Vinaya and I could pack up Guru's musical instruments afterward and drive back to Queens in time to put all the instruments away and then hang out at Guru's house with the other regulars and relax. Then, sometime around midnight, Guru would tell everyone to go home for the night.

On this particular night, though, we got back very late because of the long, out-of-state drive. The house was dark. But that wasn't really a problem for us. We had keys and the combination to the cypher-locked doors. That night, Vinaya said that he'd unload most of the instruments into Guru's garage, which was then used for storage, while I should take Guru's favorite instruments -- the flute, cello, harmonium, and esraj -- into the house and put them in their usual spots in the living room.

So, I unlocked the door, carefully picked up the esraj and its bow, and walked into the house through the side door. I went up a short flight of stairs, turned right, and made my way into the darkened -- but not completely dark -- living room. To my surprise, Guru was sitting in his usual oversized recliner. Garima was sitting on the floor in front of him massaging his feet.

Now, back in the day, I kept pretty close attention to who was permitted to touch Guru. There were just a handful of disciples given that honor. None of them were girls.

I was surprised to see Garima at Guru's feet. She looked a little surprised to see me, too. But she quickly focused back on Guru and Guru didn't seem worried by my presence as I walked in and out a few more times bringing in the rest of the instruments.

When Vinaya and I were done, we left. As I walked home that early morning, I reflected on what I'd seen and actually thought it was pretty cool that Garima was allowed to massage Guru. I figured that as a doctor, she must have had the ability to think about the body in a very clinical -- and unsexual -- way.

I had -- and have -- no problem with what I saw that night. I don't think it was sexual. In hindsight, though, it has helped me understand how Guru hid things from even those disciples who seemingly spent every waking hour with him.

Whether she likes it or not, it is perhaps fitting that Garima is the Center's last hope. She's a doctor, after all, and is strong enough, smart enough, and has the personal integrity not to buckle under the extreme pressure she must be under.

That's my hope anyway. She knows the truth. Without courage, however, without the willingness to lose everything you once held dear, the truth means nothing.

(Seriously, if you haven't watched the video above, take at least 5 or 6 minutes and watch the main speech. Here's a quick plot summary if you haven't seen the movie before.)

Made some significant edits from the original. First, and foremost, I got a little too far in front of the story for those involved and included a little too much personal detail. For that I'm sorry, and I've removed it. Second, the original post incorrectly stated that both these women had sex with Guru, when apparently just one did (the other was pressured by Guru to have sex with another female disciple). Finally, the original post stated both girls were kicked out of the Center. Apparently, one fled the Center preemptively, while the other may want to remain. I'm sorry for the errors. (November 7, 2009.)

Comments

Lynn said…
Well said Joe, the walls that held in the secrecy and dis-ease are finally crumbling and I hope that those who find their way out will join us in the discussions here and on the sri-chinmoy-information site. Having a place to tell your own story and to hear stories of those who were also there is the fastest way to find balance after such an upheaval, and I hope they know they will be welcomed and supported.
Lynn/Durga
AM Europe said…
I have (correctly or incorrectly) gathered that Garima was one of the 11 people appointed by Guru to officially run the centre. This started around 2005 when they founded the Centre Church (possibly for tax reasons or legal reasons).
6 of these are elected every year or biannually in (what at least used to be) mock elections, to be on the committee that officially runs the Sri Chinmoy centre.

Another member of this group, Kaylash, gave a talk in Europe just after the passing of Guru, and mentioned that "There is a rumor that Guru had said that after his passing there would be no new disciples". (I have a recording of Kaylash's talk).

The committee must have discussed this for a while and decided to dismiss the idea, and keep recruiting new disciples.
Anonymous said…
You are very courageous, my brother, and I ADMIRE you totally.

If ONLY more disciples and True Seekers like yourself would take a sincerely dispassionate, spiritually discerning, intellectually discriminating, and emotionally detatched LOOK at the goings on in the SCC over the years and the rather ODD behavior of our former Gurudeva, they would SEE for themselves, and not merely have to take the word of OTHERS, that CKG was DEFINITELY NOT the Highest and Most Transcendental Avatar to hit the Earth plane for "the next 500,000 years, at least," to quote the Maestro himself.

It's TIME for the unconditionally surrendered and BLINDLY devoted disciples of Guru Chinmoy to move FORWARD with their REAL lives of aspiration and inspiration and GRADUATE from the "spiritual kindergarden" (Lex Hixon's, the original Purushottoma's extremely accurate take on the Centre) and get a REAL spiritual life.

Aum. Shanti.

And Tat Tvam Asi.

Swadhin Gary Duke of Dharma (SCC years: 1970-1980, and proud of it, BTW)
Anonymous said…
Guru obviously couldn't have cared less about what happened to the SCC and what remained of the divinely devoted and unconditionally surrendered crew after his demise, otherwise he would have taken at least SOME measure to ensure its continuance, but either appointing a "dharma heir" or set up some means by which the SCC could possibly grow and flourish.

I mean, what's the REAL story now?

Is Ranjana Devi in charge?

Is she the new spiritual leader of the SCC?

Or is it Rupantar & Sanatan and the Swanson Brothers?

Seriously, can anybody tell us what's REALLY going on at the highest levels (and I don't mean consciousness-wise) of the organization?

And BTW, are the Love Offerings still flowing into the coffers of Ranjana & Co.?

Hello, Garima, if you're out there......(we KNOW that Kailash won't tell us anything REAL, that's for sh*t sure!!!)

Swadhin aka Deano ('70-'80)
Y. said…
These posts themselves suggest one of the biggest deficiencies thus far in the organization's transition from Guru's death: a lack of transparency.

It's a huge problem in organizations generally and by itself -- with none of the other malignant problems the Center faces -- can bring down an organization.

The process is opaque and people don't know what's going on, so they begin to speculate, to guess, rumors start, misunderstandings compound, and the organization suffers.

This is terribly sad because a lack of transparency is also one of the easiest problems to solve -- you just have to share information, be open, and communicate.

As to the individuals named, I'm a strong believer in giving them a chance. As Swadhin has rightly suggested, the leadership -- such as it is -- wasn't trained for this.

I tend to believe, to hope, that they are acting in good faith.

Perhaps it's just a failure of imagination, and with that, perhaps we can give them some good ideas (whether they want them or not!).
Anonymous said…
I sighed when I read the news about the involvement of another two women.

To those who are having difficulty accepting the growing awareness of corruption within the SCC, know that you are not alone and others have gone before you. Also know that facing the truth will bring you ultimately to freedom.

Your spiritual yearnings are not an illusion. Dealing with these current disappointments will help you develop the strength of being necessary for a more fulfilling spiritual life.

If you decide to leave the SCC, seeking help from a professional counsellor with expertise in high demand spiritual groups can be of immense help.

Terra.

terraaustralis01@yahoo.com.au
Y. said…
Thanks for reading and for your kind words!
Anonymous said…
Why is the possiblity that the allegations are mere lies fabricated by those who sort to bring him down, not discussed? What about the possiblity of copycat syndrome?
Anonymous said…
I hope you are not serious. What woman would ever lie about something like this?
I happen to know one of these women very well, and I can assure you, these are not lies. I wish they were.
Y. said…
Thanks for commenting.

I have discussed this possibility -- that the allegations of sexual misconduct have been fabricated in my recent post "Crying Wolf."

I don't know much about the Copycat Syndrome, but it appears to be a psychological theory used to help explain why certain phenomena, like the periodic school shootings that break out across our great nation from time to time, occur.

The theory does not seem to answer the primary question you raise, which is whether these women are telling the truth or not.

In other words, if it were determined that these women were lying, then perhaps the Copycat Syndrome would help us understand why all these women made up the same lie. Whether they are, in fact, lying is a separate question.

The data suggests that 90% of women making allegations of sexual misconduct are telling the truth.

Meaning, that with six women (so far) making these allegations, the chances that all six are lying are miniscule.

Ultimately, it is for each one of us to determine whether to believe them or not.

I'll leave you with one last thought though. When the latest SF disciple -- who has now been kicked out of the Center -- reveals herself publicly, it will be very hard for most current disciples to dismiss her out of hand.
Viddyut said…
well, I've worked with these girls for 7 years. When you work with people very closely over a long period of time, you see deeper layers of peoples personalities. Starting with work ethic, physical and mental habits, and ultimately how selfish or selfless they really are. You can't fake being a certain way for 7 years. I dismissed Sevika's story as well as the others, simply because I didn't know them and thought they were too unbelievable. And when Suchatula wrote her story, I believed it right away. We may have had our differences in the kitchen, but I know that she's not a selfish liar. I've spent many many hours speaking with each of these girls, in person and on the phone.

Destroying Guru with false allegations would be an incredibly selfish act. None of these girls are crazy or selfish enough. Not even close.
It's very sad that the Centre's only response is destruction. You made the great point that the ironic thing is that these women were 100% for guru. I wish there was someone that could be talked sense to. The Centre has perpetuated enough hurt. Time to take responsibility and move forward to a better, less dark, future.

And Terra, you're great.
Anonymous said…
For an example, look at the vein of this conversation, everyone blindly believes what is being presented. Not one person is challenging the material being put forward.Look at politics, if you wan to bring someone down,you tell lies about him. LOOK WHAT HAPPENED TO JESUS. Fucking liers took him down. Ckg,s manifestations over 50 years and the allegations ( of which he predicted) dont add up. Im sorry not everyone believes the phony and unproven allegations.
Y. said…
I'm not sure that's fair though, to say that I "blindly" believe the allegations.

Six women have come forward with specific allegations. I knew/know three of them personally (Sevika, Suchatula, and one of SF's new ex-disciples). I've listened to their allegations and judge them credible.

That's not blind belief. That's evaluating the available evidence.

I challenge you -- and there should be nothing to frighten you, I assume you're a truth seeker -- to answer this one question: if I told you that I had a high quality video confirming one of these allegations, would you watch it?

If your answer is no, I hope you'll have the courage to say so and to acknowledge that you don't want to know the truth.

If you don't have the courage to say no, I'll take your silence to mean the same thing.

(And don't quibble with the hypothetical. Accept it at face value and answer it. After you answer the question directly, then you can quibble with it and feel free to ask me some of your own.)
@Anonymous

We aren't challenging because we know it's true. Would it make you happier if these women brought a legal suit against the Centre so everything could methodically be uncovered under oath?

There are a few of us that worked with these women for over a decade, 6 days a week for $1.50 per hour. There is a reason the entire SF Centre believes these women, with the exception of probably two to three--because we know their character.

These women have nothing to gain by taking guru down. In fact, they are bravely subjecting themselves to people like you, which is no fun at all.
Lynn said…
I think it would have more meaning ANONYMOUS, if when calling these women liers you had the courage to sign your name. The women whose characters you are slandering have the courage to put their names behind their statements, I am wondering why you do not???? I'll bet you are an active member of the SCC manifestation committee, and are following an agenda that may be the 'party' line, am I right??? No problem, but, let's make this discussion a little more transparent.
hugs, Lynn
Anonymous said…
Oh, come on, already!, with the Copy Cat theory to rationalize and sweet under the rug all these fist hand accounts of Guru's having sex with His spiritual daughters.

I had occasion to call one of these women about a totally unrelated matter, and was not particularly interested in hearing her sex-with-Guru story, yet somehow she brought it up and told me about it in a way that was not only VERY genuine, but EXTREMELY heartfelt as well.

I subsequently met this woman in person and there is JUST NO WAY, that she is making this stuff up!

I'm sorry, but my spiritual bullshit detectors are finely tuned, and after my 10 year stint in the SCC, I KNOW when I'm hearing spiritual bullshit and when I'm not, take it from me.

This is SO reminiscent of the DENIAL that has gone on for oh so long in the Roman Catholic Church, until now FINALLY, everybody KNOWS what was REALLY going on in those confessionals and altar boy meetings.

I mean, come on, gimme a break, willya?

Does anybody but the most tried and true True Believer type REALLY believe that ALL these women are making ALL this stuff up merely to discredit the Highest Avatar of All Time?

Hello???

Anybody home???

Er, DUH!!!!

Lord Have Mercy, indeed!!!

Swadhin aka Deano ('70-'80)
Anonymous said…
Why do all, or seemingly all, of the pro-Guru posters HIDE behind the Anonymous moniker and REFUSE to reveal their REAL names, while the rest of us, who apparently are simply interested in taking a look at the REAL TRUTH about CKG are totally open and willing to reveal just WHO we are?

Why can't people like "Concerned Citizen" and other Anonymous posters give their real names?

What, exactly, are they AFRAID of?

I have to admit, I really don't get it.

Speaking of Jesus, as Eamon (I believe it's him b/c of the spelling error (liers) and the frantic tone of his post), don't forget, "You shall know the Truth and the Truth shall set you Free."

And we're not simply talking about "FREE Meditation Classes" here either, haha.

Swadhin '70-'80
Y. said…
Sometimes I feel like a train engineer. Things get slow, I gotta shovel more coal in the fire; other times a gotta tug on the emergency break a little.

First, lots of good, heartfelt comments in support of our spiritual sisters. That's got to be comforting to them. I hope they know how much support they have here.

That said, let me stand up for Anonymous10:14.

Obviously, he/she doesn't believe the allegations. I'm sure why, but I hope he'll explain his reasons. It may be, in part, emotions.

As I think we'd all agree, this is really tough stuff to digest. It takes time.

It may also be that he/she doesn't personally know any of the women making the allegations. When we ask a disciple (or former disciple for that matter) to choose between a Guru whom the person never saw do anything wrong and a former disciple making these allegations whom the person never knew. The result is almost predictable.

I mean, I feel sheepish saying it now, but it's obvious from my blog that I had trouble coming to grips with Sevika's allegations, and I knew her well, liked and respected her, and owed her a great deal. (I'm truly sorry for that Sevika.)

I think, though, what got me through was my interest in facts. My need to know the truth, no matter how painful it is. That's why I asked Anonymous10:14 the hypothetical question.

Do you want to know the truth?

And that's why it's a tough question for many people to answer -- because when you fully embrace the idea of being a truth seeker, you never know what kind of pain you're in for.
Y. said…
P.S., I don't think he was calling our sister disciples liars, I think he was referring to those who crucified Jesus.
AM Europe said…
I believe the number of rape accusations being false, are more around 30% in the US (I sent you some studies on email). That being said - I believe all the stories (the 4 I have read) to be true. When I heard the first story ten years ago (mostly on the inspiration site) it was so twisted that I dismissed it. And when my friends started leaving the path over that story I thought they had lost their minds. But once I read the real story (stories) last year, I believed it( them) immediately.
Specially after they have been verified by a number of people I trust (people who have spoken with the women).
Anonymous said…
None of the ex=disciples i talk to believe the malicious slander campaign thats has been thrown on CKG. Not so long ago there was an avatar called Jesus..or have you forgotten, and look what happened to him....Lies, slander the crusifiction.....
As for my anonomous position....tell me why does terra australis refuse to identify himself....
EVERY JESUS HAS HIS JUDUS....icecream man!
Y. said…
A few points:

You studiously avoided my question: if these allegations are true and you could magically know that truth, would you choose to know the truth or choose not to know the truth?

There are plenty of legitimate reasons for people to post anonymously -- I have no real problem with that.

Finally -- and this is to everyone else -- there's nothing to be gained by a FLAME WAR!
Y. said…
@ AM Europe,

AME and I discussed this topic offline. In short, AME suggested that the rate of false sexual assault claims is closer to 30% (rather than the 10% I asserted in my post "Crying Wolf" and in one of the comments above).

Doing his homework, AME cited the following sources:

1)- U.S. Bureau of Criminal Justice Statistics. Criminal Victimization in the United State: 1987. Table 5, pp 18-19.
2)- Muehlenhard, Charlene L., and Hollabaugh, Lisa C. "Do Women Sometimes Say No When They Mean Yes? The Prevalence and Correlates of Women's Token Resistance to Sex." Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Vol. 54, No. 5 (1988), pp 872-879.
3)- McDowell, Charles P., Ph.D. "False Allegations." Forensic Science Digest, (publication of the U.S. Air Force Office of Special Investigations), Vol. 11, No. 4 (December 1985), p. 64.
4)- Kanin, Eugene J., Ph.D. "False Rape Allegations." Archives of Sexual Behavior, Vol. 23, No. 1 (1994), pp 81-92.
5)- Kanin, Eugene J., Ph.D. "False Rape Allegations." Archives of Sexual Behavior, Vol. 23, No.1 (1994), pp 81-92.
6)- Krajick, Kevin. "Genetics in the Courtroom: Controversial DNA testing can clear a suspect." Newsweek, Jan. 11, 1993, p. 64.

Below is the response I gave AME offline:

My data comes from this article: http://www.slate.com/id/2231012/pagenum/all/#p2.

It's very short and easy to read. Please give it a once through and see what you think. It seems to do a good job of suggesting that based on history and perhaps flawed reporting techniques the number of suspected false accusations were improperly inflated.

Based on a kind of meta-analysis, it appears that the true number floats around 8-10% for false reports.

I notice on reviewing this against the cites you give below suggests that your cites are about a decade older than the information in this article.

Here's a link to a more recent U.S. Dept. of Justice report (i.e., more recent than the one cited below), which suggests the number might be 13%. See the bulleted item at page 7 of this link: www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/pub/pdf/soo.pdf.
Lynn said…
If you add to that analysis of false reports the fact that only a very small percentage of rapes are actually reported do to the hostile and inept legal system and the shame society still places on the victims of rape, the true number is probably much lower than even 8-10%. Within the context of the SCC and the myth that Chinmoy created around his being godly and infallable it is not surprising that the stories of his sexual abuse of his spiritual daughters are coming to light only after his death. Which makes Sevika and the other women who came forward on the sri_chinmoy_information site years ago incrediblely brave.
Lynn
Anonymous said…
Thats just it Y, i find the allegations a transparent act of malicious hostility to bring down Ckg,s manifestation. His flawless manifestation over many decades does not in anyway reveal any weakness,s. His consciousness alone is untainted. Every Jesus has his Judas!
Y. said…
Well, I'm not going to beat a dead horse.

I think I made my point (or you made it for me by refusing to answer the simple question put to you). You're not interested facts or evidence, because you've already decided.

Peace.
Anonymous said…
The facts are the only thing of interest to me. Your refusal to accept an alternate view point,but blindly swallow the transparent malicious propagander , (which is all that it is)and not allow for the possiblity for the fact that people have the capacity to lie and act like sheep, lacks intellectual depth.
Every Jesus has his Judas.
Celia said…
To the very determined Anonymous:
First,
If you do not wish to hear the truth then what on earth are you doing on this blog?
Second,
If you are brave enough to talk to me, My email address is suchatula@mail.com. You can email me your telephone number or I can email you mine.
I would be very happy to tell you the names of all the girls involved that are still in the centre and support ckg. Like you they have not given their names. They know the truth and seem to have accepted it. So if you'd like to speak with them and hear their side of the story then contact me and I will tell you who to talk to. Of course, then you'd have to believe them as well, which it seems that no matter what, you are unwilling to do.
Third,
You should also keep in mind that if ckg were still alive he would have thrown you out for reading this blog, not to mention participating in the discussions. He could not stop the truth from coming out and neither will you.
If you do not want to hear the Truth you really do not have to. Just get off this blog and get on with your spiritual life. All this time spent here could be time spent worshipping your master.
You are wasting your time trying to fight a losing battle.

To Joe and Elizabeth Kracht and all the very kind hearted people who have believed and supported me and all the girls who have spoken out, I Thank You dearly. Part of not coming out sooner was that you feel alone in the world and that no one would ever believe you. The support I got helped me want to live again. A mere, "thank you" does not do you justice. I truly can not thank you enough.

Last to everyone, I am not trying to destroy ckg or his centre. I simply want the truth revealed. I believe that the centre could save itself but first it would have to be willing to face the truth. As it is right now you (the centre) are destroying the centre by your unwillingness to face the truth.
It is very sad that ckg has created this disaster.
Anonymous said…
As far as bringing down CKG's "manifestation" goes, Come On, WHAT manifestation, pray tell?

Even Freddie Lenz Zen Master Rama's manifestation is greater than CKG's. He's got some Buddhist Institution thing going on at Naropa University in Boulder CO that's been getting a lot of play lately, eventhough Freddie was even MORE bogus than was our formerly beloved Gurudeva.

All the Good Boys Manifestation Committee and Ashrita can come up with are the likes of the World's Biggest Lollipop, for Chrissakes!!

Check out the Sri Chinmoy Inspiration site to get all the latest exciting details.

CKG's manifestation???

I dun thin sew, Loosie!!

Sri Sri Desi Arnaz aka Swadhin Gary Rigzin Dorje the very First Duke of Dharma.

PS: Give me a break, willya, Mr. Anonymous?? haha.
Anonymous said…
Who makes the 'kicking out' decisions these days - the Mother of the Universe Alo; Queen Ranjana; or the almighty 'committee'? Whoever it is has not got it quite right. Guru used to give money to the girls he had sex with, as an enticement to stay in the centre and keep their mouths shut. He didn't kick them out for goodness sake. The last thing he wanted was a disgruntled former sex object telling the world the truth about what had happened. Who is making such a mess of channelling the Maesto's wishes these days?
JEEVAN said…
I never saw in guru that sex energy. I was a fairly good disciple, never had a girlfriend on the side, worked hard in the enterprises for nothing and next to nothing. Ironically when I was having troubles with my celibacy commitment I was counseled( successfully) by one or two of the women who had admitted to having a long term sexual relations with guru. What I got from Guru wasnt false. Also the pain and confusion caused to others by gurus behind the scenes abuses is not false. What is clear as day to me is that ex-Disciples make outstanding human beings: well rounded, spiritually aware and able to access their heart ( if they choose) What is the way forward for not only the victims of abuse and the Sri Chinmoy Center. This should be the topic of the next few blogs.
Smith said…
Re: Anonymous of November 10 2009 3:06 AM

Very amusing!

At least Chinmoy had a bit of nous.
Anonymous said…
I believe the accounts. AND I know that like many others, I have experienced profound experiences with and from CKG. I'm very committed to spiritual growth and think that can best be done in a community devoted to one anothers spiritual best. I am moved by Sundari's appreciation for her time on the path.
I hate the shunning and secrecy and am pondering and praying to know my next step.
Thanks so much for this site with its balanced perspective.

and for now - I'm anonymous.
Y. said…
@ Anonymous 1:26: Thanks for reading and for your very warm comments.

If moved, please feel free to email me at yogaloy@yahoo.com and we can discuss things off the record. My promise. Peace.

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